where am i from again
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Randomize