How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
