guys are not supposed to queef...right?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
