And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We're using joints as your birthday candles
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
