Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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