if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
