therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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