It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize