2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
