well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
