Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
