Someone shit on the floor
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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