Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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