sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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