he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
she pinky promised me she was 18
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
