What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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