Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize