haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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