Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
