Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Bring me that man meat
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
