We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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