he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
