sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
