you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
