He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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