Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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