Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
