if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
