Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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