Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
