But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
