make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize