I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
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