so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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