i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
