That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize