How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
