NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Naked. naked and bneed help.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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