Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
