her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
