Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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