I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize