I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
