If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
