Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
