Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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