Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
