Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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