Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I love having hate sex.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
