all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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