How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize