I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
My dick has a subreddit
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
i think i just lost a toe
Text me some of your sweat
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
