She's JV to your varsity
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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